The High School Reunion

('The Long and Winding Road' -- yep, that was our senior class song)   Last week, in the midst of dealing with my dad's emergency surgery and recovery, I found myself at my high school reunion.  The latter had been planned months ago so it was fortuitous that I was already going to be in town to see my dad.   This was probably the first reunion that I didn't stress about losing weight or finding something great to wear....older and wiser, I guess:)  I don't know if it was due to the down economy, but the planners of this reunion chose to keep things relatively inexpensive and low key, and it worked well. Casual attire was the name of the game and barbecue fare was on the menu.  And in typical SPCHS fashion, there was a keg and we kicked it by night's end.  There was also a ridiculously cheap cash bar and a DJ who spun music from the era.                                                                                           I don't care what kind of high school experience you may have had -- and for the record, mine was pretty darn good -- but we all tend to approach these 5 year incremental milestones with a hint of curiosity and dread!  I haven't attended every get-together, but tonight I was just looking forward to the party.   But, the ever-nagging insecurities often rear their ugly heads --  How do I make my life sound interesting?; How do I sound cheery when I get the inevitable questions -- married? No; Kids? No;  Followed by the inevitable, what do you do?; Will I recognize everyone?  Will people recognize me?  No matter how confident we are, there is a tendency at these events to revert to old circles of friends, cliques and stereotypes.  But tonight, I noticed something different.                                                                               Sure we initially gravitated to those we know best, but there was none of the stuffiness; none of the dread; none of the hesitation about talking to anyone outside the comfort zone.  Yes, there were awkward pauses and stilted chatter, but I made a point of connecting with people I don't see very often and re-connecting with those that have been out of my life for too long. Who knows...maybe this is how most people always feel at reunions and I have only just discovered my 'I don't give a damn' mentality. Or maybe it's that age, wisdom and wrinkles are the great equalizer.                                                                                              I had a fabulous chat with my grade school pal who I haven't seen since graduation -- she was probably the person in the room that I've known the longest.  I regularly saw her Christmas card, complete with ever expanding family, on my aunt's mantle (they had worked together and exchanged Christmas cards every year)  I also had a really great conversation about education with my old cheering buddy from junior high and high school.  I also spent a good deal of the night fighting back good-natured jabs at my perceived care-free lifestyle -- I go to a lot of concerts and seem to be on the go, per facebook status updates. In my defense, I only post when I have something fun going on:)  I marveled that most people had children, yes even that person, and some were in high school and college by now.  And I was also struck by the losses that many have endured.  Look, I won't lie, there were probably a couple of people I didn't make much of an effort to mingle with, but there were more that I regretted not having had time to spend time with.  It is for this reason, I hope we find a way to do these low-key reunions every two or three years instead.  And with the advent of social media, it should be easier to stay in touch and plan.     Another thing I noted was that the conversations were rooted in the present and future -- there was little talk of the old-days, except when we were trying to remember the last time we had spoken.  Who knows, maybe we just couldn't remember those details any more:) Even though I may not have as much in common with the lives of my high school classmates and friends, there is an unbreakable bond among us and it was evident this night.                                                                                             So I say to you, don't stay away out of fear or disinterest.  Make the time -- it may be just the exercise in confidence-building you need!